Friday, May 23, 2014

Stress you say? Well...fucky you!

So it is in the world of Chaos, and where your mind is fractured into more than one entity, stress has a habit of making reality take a shit on you.  It's not so much the event itself that is the issue, but more the fact that one fragment takes over and shoves the others into a little box until the stressor is gone.  Much like lighting a fire under a bucket of rats, the buried parts become agitated and eventually explode in a fucktastic display of lost time, inappropriate behavior, and all around unwanted chaos and disruption of life.  The most damning part of this process is the fragment that takes control seems to be immune to many of the drugs normally used to help alleviate stress, "emotions are irrelevant, they impede the process of functioning, law and order will be maintained until necessity no longer presents itself."  So basically I operate as a normal human being, I play through emotion as I should, I act as I should, I present as I should, though being unattached to these emotions and unable to feel them causes distress. There is nothing more disheartening than watching the perfect person you want to be and having no ability to connect and take part into that.  The next step of this process is the stressors will pass, those fragments that do feel emotion have been suppressed and will seek to release all their pent up anger, fears, and desires.  This defense mechanism seems ideal on the surface, but the backlash I am about to face and try to work through is going to be hell in a hand basket.

I hate dealing with stupid, dramatic, fat assholes.

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